Monday, January 15, 2018

Oh. My. God! I'm Defending p45!!!

Oh. My. God! I'm Defending p45!!!

A new video is making the rounds on the Internet that shows p45 standing between two military types for the National Anthem during opening ceremonies of the College Football Playoff National Championship game in Atlanta. He apparently forgot some of the words.

Sorry, I'm going to give him a pass on this one for a couple of reasons:

1. Everyone is entitled to forget the words now and again. Not to mention the melody. It's not, you know, the easiest song to sing. I've often wondered why we couldn't have something everyone could sing, like America the Beautiful, or even God Save the President. I've been singing the National Anthem for more years than many of you have been breathing. (OK, I've been saying the words and trying not to make too much noise with my best tenor* voice.) Every so often, I space out and forget the words. It happens. Big. Fracking. Deal.

It is better to be quiet when words are either unknown or forgotten than go into a rousing rendition of Ole Buttermilk Sky as I did my first time in Sunday School. I didn't know the song the other kids were singing, but I knew Ole Buttermilk Sky. Had it down pat. Mom and Dad played their record of Hoagy Carmichael singing so many times, the record came undone into a long, black, vinyl string. For those of you who don't know that classic, here it is for your listening enjoyment. Learn the words, learn the melody, you just never know when it will come in handy. (Hey! It's easier to sing than The Star-Spangled Banner!)

2. In watching the video of p45 the echoes and other noises were horrendous. If, as someone pointed out, he's hard of hearing (welcome to the club!) he probably couldn't hear enough of the song to know where in the song he should have been, and there is nothing worse than to be a word or two off in a group sing-along—unless, of course, you're singing a perpetual or infinite canon, aka round. Now there's a thought, let's sing the National Anthem as a round. Divvy the spectators up into 2, 3, or 4 parts and have each section of the stadium start their part at a different time. It sure couldn't hurt, and might even sound better.

I wear hearing aids. And even though they have filters so I can damp the background noise in high noise situations, it's still very difficult when there are a lot of echoes or a lot of different people talking or singing to hear and understand. I dislike going to most restaurants during their high volume times because the design vogue in places of fine dining (that would be anyplace that isn't considered fast food in my book) is industrial—hard surfaces that bounce noise and echo speech with no soft drapes, etc. to capture the sounds. Often, even with the filter, I can't understand everyone at my table. I do not enjoy sports bars.

Of course, if he couldn't remember the words, he could have just taken a knee. We'd have understood.

*Yes I sing best when I sing tenor—ten or twelve miles away from anyone.

Boycott Football. Save brains. Save lives.

Should you wish to add your name to the list of people apologizing for p45's reprehensible remarks about Haitians, Africans, and other people of color, please check out this petition and sign it:
or use the tiny URL

Monday, January 8, 2018

Auntie Lenora's Tips for Quitting Smoking

Happy 2018 to all of you! I trust you all had a marvelous holiday season – if nothing else, you survived it, and don't have to do a repeat until next year. Yes?

A few weeks ago, I posted Auntie Lenora's Tips for Losing Weight, and some of you wrote or called and asked me to do one on quitting smoking. Oof dah! It's been a long time since Auntie Lenora gave up her coffin nails, but, since she had a doctor's appointment coming up, she thought she'd ask her doctor for some input, and now, without further ado, here are the requested and long-awaited/hoped for

Auntie Lenora's Tips for Quitting Smoking

1. You must want to quit. I think that is the most important one of the whole bunch. YOU must want to quit. If you do it because your sweet little grandchild asked you to, because your partner nagged you to, because your doctor threw a fit about it, because you feel guilty about it for whatever reason, it ain't gonna happen. Quitting smoking is something you really, really have to want. And don't do it because someone (could that be you?) is guilting you into it or as a New Year's resolution! Do it as an After New Year resolution!

2.  Don't tell anyone you're quitting. Just do it. If you tell people you're quitting, it reinforces the fact you're giving up something you enjoy, and you'll want one of those coffin nails more than ever. Also, if you backslide, it will add guilt to an already stressful decision. Eventually, people will notice. It will be easier to quit if people don't keep asking you how you're doing. And you'll feel so good when your friends finally notice and ask if you've quit at which time you get to smile and say, "YES! Thanks for noticing." Remember, this is a process, and you just need to keep working at it. If someone offers you a smoke, thank them and say something along the lines that you just put one out, and will wait a bit. They don't have to know your 'bit' is the rest of your life or that you put it out 3 weeks ago. ;-)

3. Auntie Lenora recommends you go cold turkey. Toss your entire collection of cigarettes out, run all of your ashtrays through the dishwasher and then fill them with seashells or pretty rocks. (Don't fill them with mints, or you'll balloon up and have to deal with losing the weight (see above link for hints) and buy new clothes.

4. Get support. Auntie Lenora has mixed feelings about this one; however, if you are one of those people who benefit from support groups, either face-to-face or online, then, by all means, join a support group. You may tell those people, but don't tell anyone else. A great part of this is to learn new ways of coping, of changing, of thinking.

·         ·     Free national quitline: 800-QUIT NOW – 800 784 8669
·      Hospital quit-smoking programs
·      American Lung Association: 800 586 4872
·      American Cancer Society: 800 227 2345

5. Acupuncture. Yes, Auntie Lenora recommends acupuncture. She has used it for other ailments when traditional medicine didn't work, but not to quit smoking. However, her auntie and uncle both used it to quit a lifetime habit. Auntie said it relieved all craving, 100%. Her uncle said it didn't, but he could deal with it, so I gather it cut the urge down. They both smoked Camels and smoked heavily for many years. Again, they wanted to quit. Did the acupuncture do anything? I don't know. The important thing is, they believed it did, so it did.

6. Auntie Lenora had a good friend who quit by waiting doubling the time between each smoke for his next smoke. The first was a 5-minute wait. Then 10 minutes, then 20, then 40, then...well, you get the picture. Auntie Lenora does not recommend this method, but if cold turkey doesn't work, you might try it as a last resort.

When Auntie Lenora quit, she just quit. She was truly fortunate, because all of a sudden, they didn't taste good anymore. Blech! Auntie Lenora is one of those oh-so-disgusting people who have a non-addictive personality, so she quit. Cold turkey. There were no support groups available, at least none of which she was aware, nor were their medications out there to help. Now there are. Groups are free from many sources and nicotine replacement meds are available over the counter or by prescription from your doctor. There are benefits and there are side effects to both so Auntie Lenora suggests you make one major exception to #2 above – talk to your doctor before quitting, especially if you've been smoking a lot for many years.

There may be side effects of the nicotine withdrawal. Auntie Lenora doesn't remember any negative ones; however, a friend of hers had some. Alas, Auntie Lenora can't remember exactly what they were. Friend got through them just fine, after a couple weeks. You can look them up online, but Auntie Lenora doesn't recommend it, unless you're really affected, or think you are. Otherwise, you might develop symptoms just because.

If you have cadaver bone someplace in your body, quit now, cold turkey, and do not mess with the nicotine replacement therapy. Just quit. Do not pass Go, and do not collect $200.00. And stay away from second-hand smoke, too. But, if you have cadaver bone, I'm sure your doctor explained all that to you.

If you're still smoking, and really want to quit, Auntie Lenora wishes you well on that decision. Her tips are not, she is sure, the only ones out there. If you've quit, and have tips of your own, please share in the comments below. Or if these tips help you, share that, too.  Auntie Lenora is a curious person, as are many of her readers.

Now, go forth and have a marvelous 2018.

·     ·      Bullet remarks above are from my Doctor's office

Monday, December 18, 2017

Happy Holydays!

Wow! Next Monday night is Christmas! Where has this year gone? Is it me and my imagination, or has the clock really sped up and does time really go by faster and faster??

Anyhow, this has been quite the year for me, some dips in the daily stuff, but more highs than not.

I got past the worst attack of vertigo I've had in years (talk about a dip!), I sold a few books, wrote lots of poetry, found a boyfriend.

Just thought I'd dangle that last little bit off the above sentence and see how y'all noticed.

Frankly at my age, I'm rather surprised, shucks, I'm a whole lot surprised, that we found each other. And, I hasten to add, he's older than I am, so I am not a cougar ;-) We actually met online. OK, we were introduced by mutual friends, online. He's a writer, a poet, a musician, an artist, and a retired teacher. He's also a terrific cook, and loves Mexican food as much as I do. For what more can we ask? well, maybe to live a little closer together?

Anyhow, 2017 has been a terrifically good year, as long as I don't watch the news and start obsessing over whether our beloved country will ever recover from this current debacle. Sigh.

So, you all go forth, enjoy whatever holiday you observe during the winter, have a great (and safe) New Year's celebration and we'll all meet back here at the coffee pot next year! Honest. Trust me. (Would I lie to you?)

Taken at the Yakima River Cyn in the Fall of the Year.
Sun Burst

The sun burst
through slate-gray clouds
showered gold, blinding
gold, upon the trees
outside my window.

For the time between
two blinks, those trees
those very trees
wore formal leaves
of gold and danced.

--by Lenora Rain-Lee Good

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Space Cadet!

Yes, I am a Space Cadet.

Not sure where the intervening days went, but they just slid away, and suddenly, I realize I'm not only a dollar short -- but a day late! And nothing at all to post.

My good friend, Eric, sent this to me, and the more I thought about it, the more I thought I should share it, so here it is.

That really is pretty good advice not just for the holidays, but also for the rest of the year.

And, as Eric reminded me:

"The universe is under no obligation to make sense to any of us."
--Neil deGrasse Tyson

Monday, December 4, 2017

And Another One Bites the Dust

Remember that song? Really kinda gruesome, if you pay attention to the lyrics, but a great beat. But then, a lot of things in this life are a tad gruesome, if you want to stay alive.

Anyhow, I just saw that another one bit the dust – this time Matt Lauer. I admit I had to think a bit on that one, he did daytime tv, which I don't watch. Well, I do watch tv during the day, but not the shows he did. A lot of newscasters, actors, a lot of men are, well, biting the dust. To which I say one word: GOOD!!! It's about damn time!!

A friend and I were having a discussion about this the other night, and we're both on the same side, but he has a slightly different take on it. I say sexual harassment/abuse/rape is about one thing—power. My friend thinks it's about sex and the procreation of the species. The powerful males get the mates; father the children.

I disagree. I see it purely as power. Perhaps I am looking at the picture from a somewhat different perspective than he is. I see the harassment/abuse/rape (hereinafter shortened to rape), as power. Period. If rape did equate to sex and procreation, then men would not rape tiny babies, little boys, old women, or other men. No, it's about power. Purely and simply. They would not use it as a way to emasculate prisoners of war, to turn them into 'tractable females' if it was about sex and babies. No, it's about power. And yes, I am probably over-simplifying the topic, but I do have a limited amount of space in which to vent.

The longer the abuser gets away with it, the harder it is for victims, men or women to come out. Let's be honest until so many women started coming out about Harvey Weinstein, they were abused, harassed, and raped again—by the police, the district attorney's office, the judicial system, as well as the perpetrator who smeared them in public, and threatened them without any form of comeuppance. Many men say they thought it was consensual, and perhaps, in their minds, in their fantasies, it was. But ask the women. The victims. They have a much different story to tell.

Many years ago, I did volunteer work with a rape crisis-counseling group. Rape is not something women make up to get even with a guy. They have to go through too much at the hands of the "system" to make it worth their while. It also isn't something children make up, though if they are questioned by someone who wants them to say something specific, those questioners can lead the child to say whatever the questioner wants to hear. Are the children lying? No, they are trying to please the adult in the room.

I'm really sorry that we're seeing such a rush of accused men, but, ya know what? They asked for it. They worked for it. Do I feel sorry for them? Not on your bippy! I feel sorry for all the women (and men, though there are not as many male victims as female victims) they've abused through the years, especially the ones who were too frightened, too embarrassed, too ashamed to come forward. I hope they can, now, all come forward and get the justice and healing they so richly deserve. Especially the healing.

Many of the victims have paid for their crime of being a victim for years. They are not now wealthy, they are not now suing for money, they are now coming forward to tell their story and do their part to stop the cycle of violence before more are hurt, and I applaud them for that. I support them in that. Yes, it is a shock when I'm confronted with the news that men I have in the past admired are no longer worthy of my admiration, and in fact never were, I just didn't know it. But ya know what? Honesty is worth it. And I do still admire a rare few of the men—those who have owned it, offered no excuses, and have offered genuine apologies. Not as much as I did, and I may never completely trust them again. But I applaud their taking ownership of their problem.

For hundreds of years, the males of our species have blamed the victim when they (the males) couldn't control their own bodies. It is time to stop blaming the victim for the perpetrator's inability to behave. It is time to stop blaming the victim for "allowing" the assault, for somehow "asking" for it by the way she dressed or walked, or talked. It is time for the males of the world realize they control their own bodies, and brains--yes, both their brains. They need to own that responsibility. (They can't control their bodies so they want to control ours? Puh-leeze!)

Yes, another one bit the dust, and I bet we will see a lot of changes made in the coming months. On our televisions, in the movies, the magazines we read, the cops on the beat, the men we thought we knew.

"And another one gone, and another one gone. And another one bites the dust..."

Queen – Another One Bites the Dust